My Infatuation

Ok, well, I think the easiest way to kick off this sort of 'public diary' is explaining my 6^th grade infatuation with this fine specimen. I mean, all girls between the age of 12 and 62 have someone to obsess over, right? Well, thankfully for me, it's not like a psychotic infatuation that requires some sort of admission to some psychiatric institute, and as much as Rebecca loves to analyze me, it's perfectly acceptable to have onlyone thing on my brain.

His name is Brett. His birthtday is in 4 days, and he is quite snexy (snexy= neat+sexy, thankyou, TylerHay's Oxfort Engrish Dictionary). It's been just over 7 months since that jittery night where i was quite positive he was going to ask me out, and there's been no turning back, so to speak. I mean, what's not to like? He's incredibly intelligent, silly and caring. Three characteristics that are a must in my terms.

Seriously, if you ask anyone at the college about my favourite topic, they'll likely tell you that his name is Brett Ramsey. Well, Evan might tell you that it's Led Zeppelin, but it's mostly because I'm trying to prove a point, because Pearl Jam simply cannot be the epitome of rock and roll genres. Mostly I talk about Brett because I want to ward off all of those 'Wedding crazy' type people (that, and the infatuation thing). Nicole and I were talking tonight, and we discovered that even though most people are good at hiding it, you can tell after the first 'one-on-one' with them, they have marriage on the brain.

Don't get me wrong. I have had fantasies since childhood about the soccer mom/white picket fence/ 2.5 children type of stuff, and intend to have all my dreams come true, but right now, it seems kind of nice to 'live in the moment', you know? As cheesy and cliche as it sounds, I very much enjoy using the term 'boyfriend' instead of 'fiance' or 'husband' and I'm willing to wait for as long as it takes to be ready. Who knows, maybe I won't get married until I'm 30, and maybe quite possibly, it will be to someone else (I'm quite happy with Brett, but not everything turns out the way I want it to, so I can't put my whole world and being into our relationship). It's a good thing God is steering this, because at 18, I was positive that there was nothing more to life than my guitar and my future husband. Just ask Becca, she'll tell you!

It could also be because of a 'falling out' I've been experiencing for about the last 3 weeks with my best friend. See, we're about the same age (actually, her birthday is the same as Brett's!), and she fell in love with a wonderful man. They had an amazing apartment together, and it appeared as though they were going to live happily ever after. Well, there were a few bumps in the road, but if you're a realistic person, you'll chew the meat and spit out the bones. Long story short, I get back to school, and find out that they had broken up in the worst way.
I'm heartbroken. I don't know what to do about it. I want to be there to support my friend, but how? I can't condone what she did, not in a million years. It was the most heinous way to break up with such a good match. So what does Terrin do when she doesn't know what to do? Nothing. I've been avoiding talking to her, in fear that it will damage our friendship further, and cause hurt feelings. I love her to pieces, but I'm to the point where I don't feel like even I can trust her. We told each other everything. So now what do I tell her, the truth? Do I lie? How about neither. I can simply put it off for the time being, and address it when I have a better strategy.

So back to Brett. Yes, I really do think about him a lot. This whole distance thing drives me nuts, even though I know it's good for the both of us. Seriously, anyone that can outdo Nicole in Inuendo Chicken should be within at least 100 metres of me.

Anyway, more ideas and thoughts shall be saved for another day, since I appear to be rambling.
Blessings!